Favorite Comedic Quotes

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Italian Ice · #31 Post by **Italian Ice** » Fri Jan 09, 2009 6:18 am

From Love For Sale Boat

Mac: What kind of sleaze do you think I am?
TM: Is this multiple choice?

I use that TM comment every chance I get, gets them every time....

Carmen · #32 Post by **Carmen** » Fri Jan 09, 2009 2:13 pm

TM: Hi HO!
.. and then that look into the camera - I just love it

Italian Ice · #33 Post by **Italian Ice** » Sat Feb 28, 2009 11:01 am

Love this one from "Home from the Sea"

Agatha: Isn't the ocean beautiful at sunset? So soft....so peaceful...so romantic!
Higgins: Agatha my dear.....
Agatha: Yes Johnathan?
Higgins: I know what you're thinking. (LOL)
Agatha: You do?
Higgins: You're trying to capture my queen by sacrificing your knight.
Agatha: Oh Johnathan! Sometimes you a royal ass! I need some tea! (walks away)

Higgins: Sometimes I think I shall never understand women.....

Agatha · #34 Post by **Agatha** » Sat Feb 28, 2009 7:54 pm

Absolutely!! The humor in this show is almost like another character! It's always there...sometimes clearly and sometimes more subtle. I bet there's not a single episode that doesn't include a comedic quote of some kind.

I've been wracking my brain all morning trying to come up with one that hasn't already been mentioned. The truth of it is that I agree with MPS, N1095A and rubberchicken...my all time favorite is "Pickled egg, please."

I also like "Hi, Ho." "She was a BIG nun." and "Jonathan! You're buns are smoking!" The dialog from Dead Man's Channel is great and I actually thought of having "Oh, Jonathan! Sometimes you are a royal ass!" for my signature but then Agatha isn't THAT angry with Higgins that often so I went with the more typical quote.

Great topic, Italian Ice!!

Now watch...as soon as I submit this, I'll think of a FANTASTIC one!!

Italian Ice · #35 Post by **Italian Ice** » Sat Feb 28, 2009 8:12 pm

Old Acquaintence (when the entire gang is looking through TM's yearbook)

Higgins: "Impossible, Magnums friends are seldom illiterate let alone incapable of quoting Emily Dickinson"

Italian Ice · #36 Post by **Italian Ice** » Sat Feb 28, 2009 9:29 pm

I wrote this one in the thread of "Of Sound Mind" but had to mention it here. That one is also one of my favorite episodes.......

My favorite part was when TM gets out of the hospital after hurting his leg.

Rick: I saw in this movie once where they bumped off this guy for his money. They took a lawnmower, an electric lawnmower and threw it right in the bathtub, bzzzzzzzzzz (que TC and TM's expression) It fried him just like that. You better take showers. (LOL)
TM: Guys!
TC: Come to think of it, you better stay out of the kitchen too, all sorts of things can happen in there. Gas, poisoning, garbage disposals
TM: Garbage disposals??
Rick: And look on the bright side of it pal, at least nobody's shooting at you...

Cue gun shots at the start of the charity ball. I nearly fell off my chair when I saw that one.

Shermy · #37 Post by **Shermy** » Sat Feb 28, 2009 10:31 pm

In Two Birds of a Feather, Higgins' reaction after the plane has crashed into the tidal pool:

"Magnum!! What have you done?"

I also love his comment to Magnum, when he finds him playing the saxophone. I don't recall the exact episode, but he calmly gestures for Magnum to stop before asking:

"Magnum. Why do this horrible thing?"

#38 Post by **J.J. Walters** » Sun Mar 01, 2009 6:54 am

Agatha wrote:The humor in this show is almost like another character! It's always there...sometimes clearly and sometimes more subtle.

Yes, indeed!

Agatha wrote:"Jonathan! You're buns are smoking!"

It's "Jonathan! Come quickly! Your buns are smoking!" Important distinction.

Agatha · #39 Post by **Agatha** » Sun Mar 01, 2009 7:11 am

Hmmmmm. Know what, James? I'm not even going to go there!!

#40 Post by **Doc Ibold** » Sun Mar 01, 2009 8:26 am

Shermy wrote:In Two Birds of a Feather, Higgins' reaction after the plane has crashed into the tidal pool:

"Magnum!! What have you done?"

I also love his comment to Magnum, when he finds him playing the saxophone. I don't recall the exact episode, but he calmly gestures for Magnum to stop before asking:

"Magnum. Why do this horrible thing?"

I want to say its "Mad Buck Gibson"

#41 Post by **J.J. Walters** » Sun Mar 01, 2009 5:51 pm

Agatha wrote:Hmmmmm. Know what, James? I'm not even going to go there!!

Hey, I didn't write it. I'm just reporting on it.

It is a somewhat shocking double entendre for prime time TV in circa 1982. You hear stuff like that all the time today, but back then it was pretty rare!

Doc Ibold wrote:
Shermy wrote:I also love his comment to Magnum, when he finds him playing the saxophone. I don't recall the exact episode, but he calmly gestures for Magnum to stop before asking:

"Magnum. Why do this horrible thing?"

I want to say its "Mad Buck Gibson"

That's one of my very favorite scenes. It's from "Of Sound Mind". I actually have an audio clip of the scene on the site...

http://magnum-mania.com/Audio/Emasculated_Rodent.html

Higgins: How fiendishly deceptive of you Magnum. I could have sworn I was hearing the emasculation of a large rodent. To my great surprise, I see the sounds are emanating from what I thought was a harmless musical instrument.

LOL!

AlohaSpirit · #42 Post by **AlohaSpirit** » Sun Mar 01, 2009 7:43 pm

I think Higgins has a great sense of humor and John Hillerman delivers the lines with a completely serious demeanor, something I could never do

Magnum: I prefer to be called a private investigator.
Higgins: You just prefer to be called.

(from The Pilot maybe??)

Shermy · #43 Post by **Shermy** » Sun Mar 01, 2009 7:50 pm

James J. Walters wrote:Higgins: How fiendishly deceptive of you Magnum. I could have sworn I was hearing the emasculation of a large rodent. To my great surprise, I see the sounds are emanating from what I thought was a harmless musical instrument.

Thanks for the clip, James. Higgins is absolutely brutal in that one!

I couldn't remember if it was terrible or horrible, but just to set the record straight:

"Why, Magnum? Why do this terrible thing?

There are times when Hillerman came very close to stealing the entire show away from Selleck.

Agatha · #44 Post by **Agatha** » Sun Mar 01, 2009 10:56 pm

I know, James. And you're right, it's pretty risque for it's time. But if anyone could get away with a double entendre like this in a prime time 80's series, it would have been Agatha. She SO OBVIOUSLY is not saying what we're ALL hearing!

Italian Ice · #45 Post by **Italian Ice** » Mon Mar 02, 2009 7:56 am

Also on the "Distant Relative" thread.

1.
TM: "I'll remember, Orvie" (after hearing that Wendy calls Rick by that name.)

2.
Rick: "The closest thing she's come to alcohol was sacramental wine"
(Then Wendy orders something called a Bora Gora Bazooka! That sounds strong!)
*It has 2 kinds of rum, vodka, 3 kinds of liqueur, and fruit punch

3.
TM: "Maybe we can catch the last half of Bambie. Thumper might still be alive."

4.
TM: "All I saw was....Carol Channing"
Rick: "At the movies!?"